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Gary Lewandowski

Gary W. Lewandowski Jr., Ph.D.

  • Professor
  • Member of the Institutional Review Board (IRB)

Department: Psychology

Office: Howard Hall 120

Phone: 732-263-5476


Gary W. Lewandowski Jr., Ph.D., focuses his research, writing, and public speaking on three main areas: romantic relationships, self and identity, and the scholarship of teaching and learning (SoTL). He has published over 50 academic articles and book chapters, given over 120 conference presentations, authored over 150 articles for mass media outlets, co-edited The Science of Relationships: Answers To Your Questions about Dating, Marriage, And Family, and co-authored an innovative research methods textbook, Discovering the Scientist Within: Research Methods in Psychology. His work has been featured by the Washington Post,, Daily Mail, Business Insider, Salon, The New Republic, Time, and Newsweek, and he has appeared in the New York Times, The Atlantic, VICE, CNN, and NPR, among others. He currently writes The Psychology of Relationships blog on Psychology Today, and his TED talk, Break-ups Don’t Have to Leave You Broken, has been viewed nearly 2 million times. He has also authored a trade book about relationships with Little Brown & Company, Stronger Than You Think: The 10 Blind Spots That Undermine Your Relationship…and How to See Past Them


Ph.D., Stony Brook University

M.A., Stony Brook University

B.A., Millersville University of Pennsylvania

Research Interests

Lewandowski’s primary research focuses on the role of self in romantic relationships including such processes as: attraction, relationship initiation, relationship maintenance, infidelity, and break-up. His other research focuses on improving the pedagogy of teaching research methods and statistics.


Lewandowski, G. W., Jr. (2021). Stronger than you think: The 10 blind spots that undermine your relationship…and how to see past them. Little Brown: Spark.

Mattingly, B. A., & McIntyre, K. P., & Lewandowski, G. W., Jr. (Eds.) (2020). Interpersonal relationships and self-concept change. Springer Publishers.

Lewandowski, G. W., Jr., Ciarocco, N., & Strohmetz, D. B. (2019). Discovering the scientist within: Research methods in psychology (2nd Edition). Worth Publishers.

Lewandowski, G. W., Jr., Loving, T., Le, B., & Gleason, M. (Eds.) (2011). The science of relationships: Answers to your questions about dating, marriage, and family. Dubuque, IA: Kendall Hunt.

Scholarly Articles

Hughes, E. K.*, Lewandowski, G.W. Jr., & Slotter, E. B. (2020). Expanding who I am: Validating the Preferences for Self-Expansion Scale. Journal of Personality Assessment, 102, 792-803. DOI: 10.1080/00223891.2019.1641109

Tomlinson, J. K., Hughes, E. K.*, Lewandowski, G.W. Jr., Aron, A. P., & Geyer, R. (2019). Do shared self-expanding activities have to be physically arousing? Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 36, 2781-2801.

Lewandowski, G.W. Jr. (2018). My watch has ended: A department chair’s exit interview. The Department Chair, 29, 9-11.

Dwiggins, J.* & Lewandowski, G. W., Jr. (2015) Does hard work pay off? The influence of perceived effort on romantic attraction. Interpersona: An International Journal on Personal Relationships, 9, 184-199 . doi:10.5964/ijpr.v9i2.174

Lewandowski, G. W., Jr., Mattingly, B. A., & Pedreiro, A.* (2014). Under pressure: The effects of stress on positive and negative relationship behaviors. Journal of Social Psychology, 154, 463-473. doi: 10.1080/00224545.2014.933162

Mattingly, B. A., & Lewandowski, G. W., Jr. (2014). Expanding the self brick by brick: Non-relational self-expansion and self-concept size. Social Psychological and Personality Science, 5, 483 – 489. doi: 10.1177/1948550613503886.

Mattingly, B. A., & Lewandowski, G. W., Jr. (2013). An expanded self is a more capable self: The association between self-concept size and self-efficacy. Self and Identity, 12,621-634. doi:10.1080/15298868.2012.71886

Mattingly, B. A., & Lewandowski, G. W., Jr. (2013). The power of one: Benefits of individual self-expansion. Journal of Positive Psychology, 8, 12-22.

Lewandowski, G. W., Jr., Ciarocco, N., Pettenato, M.* & Stephan, J.* (2012). Pick me up: Ego depletion and receptivity to relationship initiation. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 29, 1071-1084.

VanderDrift, L. E., Lewandowski, G. W., Jr., & Agnew, C. R. (2011). Reduced self-expansion in current romance and interest in relationship alternatives. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 28, 356-373. doi: 10.1177/0265407510382321

Lewandowski, G. W., Jr., Nardone, N.,* & Raines, A. J.* (2010). The role of self-concept clarity in relationship quality. Self and Identity, 9, 416-433. doi: 10.1080/152988609033321

Lewandowski, G. W., Jr., Aron, A., & Gee, J. (2007). Personality goes a long way: The malleability of opposite-sex physical attractiveness. Personal Relationships14(4), 571-585. doi:10.1111/j.1475-6811.2007.00172.x

Lewandowski, G. W., Jr., & Bizzoco, N.* (2007). Addition through subtraction: Growth following the dissolution of a low quality relationship. The Journal of Positive Psychology2(1), 40-54. doi:10.1080/17439760601069234

Popular Articles

Lewandowski, G. W., Jr. (2020). The 15 Questions to Check if Your Relationship Will Work, According to Experts. Yahoo News.

Lewandowski, G. W., Jr., (February 2019) Valentine’s Day 2019: Should I stay with my partner? Newsweek

Lewandowski, G. W., Jr. (2018, May). Why are we meeting like this? The 10 worst types of meetings in academe.

Lewandowski, G. W., Jr. (2017, February). Path to true love may start with your BFF.

Lewandowski, G. W., Jr. (2016, April). It’s not all tears and loneliness: The positive side of breaking up. The Washington Post.

Lewandowski, G. W., Jr. (2016, February). How to choose a valentine, according to science.

Lewandowski, G. W., Jr. (2015, November). Wedding bells or single again: Psychology predicts where your relationship is headed.

Lewandowski, G. W., Jr. (2015, June). The psychology of flirtation: How to know when someone’s interested. The Independent

Lewandowski, G. W., Jr. (2015, January). The biology of cheating. Refinery29.

Lewandowski, G. W., Jr. (2014, December). How to spot a cheater. Business Insider.

Lewandowski, G. W., Jr. (2014, October). This is the best way to flirt if you want to score a date. The Washington Post.

Presentations/Invited Talks

Lewandowski, G. W., Jr. (2018). Relationships 101: From Hook-Ups to Heartbreak. Invited talk at The New Jersey Council for the Social Studies.

Lewandowski, G. W., Jr., Strohmetz, D. B., & Ciarocco, N. J. (January, 2017). Research 2.0: Reimagining your methods course. Invited talk at the 18 th  Annual Society for Personality and Social Psychology Teaching Preconference in San Antonio, TX.

Lewandowski, G. W., Jr. (2016, January). Maintaining research productivity while being an excellent teacher.  Invited roundtable discussion presented at the Society for Personality and Social Psychology (SPSP) Conference, San Diego, CA.

Lewandowski, G. W., Jr. (2015, April). TED Talk: Break-ups Don’t Have To Leave You Broken. Talk given at the TEDx: Accelerators Conference.

Professional Associations

  • American Psychological Society (APS)
  • Eastern Psychological Association (EPA)
  • International Association for Relationship Research (IARR)
  • Society of Experimental Social Psychology (SESP)
  • Society for Personality and Social Psychology (SPSP)
  • Society for the Teaching of Psychology (STP)


  • 2016 Teacher/Scholar Travel Award from the Society for Personality and Social Psychology (SPSP)
  • Winner of the 2013 Association of American Medical Colleges (AAMC) Award for Outstanding Instruction in Pre-health Competencies: Psychology
  • Winner of the Society for Personality and Social Psychology (SPSP) Media Prize as Co-Founder & Administrator for (2012)
  • Monmouth University Distinguished Teacher Award (2012)
  • Princeton Review’s The Best 300 Professors (2012)
  • New Jersey Psychological Association (NJPA) – Emerging Researcher Award (2011)

Additional Information


Recently Taught Classes

2023 Spring

  • Research II: Behavioral Statistics and Laboratory – PY 311

2022 Fall

  • Intimate Relationships – PY 360
  • Research II: Behavioral Statistics and Laboratory – PY 311

2022 Spring

  • Research II: Behavioral Statistics and Laboratory – PY 311

2021 Fall

  • Intimate Relationships – PY 360

2021 Spring

  • Research II: Behavioral Statistics and Laboratory – PY 311

2020 Fall

  • Research II: Behavioral Statistics and Laboratory – PY 311

Frequently Taught Classes

  • Intimate Relationships (PY 360)
  • Intimate Relationships Laboratory (PY 360L)
  • Research II: Behavioral Statistics and Laboratory (PY 311)